November 17th, 2006

Tea-drinker par excellence

Didn't get the HMRC job

They must have seen through my plan to take down the system from the inside. Pah, fools! I'll make them pay with my plan to flood the UK with cheap roleplaying imports from Eastern Europe where VAT is low. The loss to the Exchequer will be massive!

Soon the UK will be deluged by such titles as:
- Stakhanovitch, a narrative coal mining game. What will you sacrifice for coal? And will your sacrifice be in vain as apparchiks outmanoeuvre you at the Soviet, "But comrade, you took of your party hat, all that coal was mined for imperialist reasons and has been seized by the party. Please report for reeducation."

- Beluga! This is the narrative game of the Vulgar Boat People. All characters are in thrall to a vicious boat master whom they seek to overthrow and replace. Each turn characters try to come up with the best insult that will stun the sturgeon into releasing its bounty. The winner gets the spoils but must take a shot of vodka. Each character has a weakness for one kind of insult and a strength for another so there is some manoeuvering to stun the others instead of the fish and grab their loot. When enough vodka has been drunk the boatmen can summon up the courage to overthrow the master and replace him with one of their own.

- Chalet, the narrative game of Bulgarian property deals and red tape. Each player takes on two roles: that of a would be Chalet owner from England and that of a cog in the Bulgarian bureaucracy. As the foreigners try to get the best deals, they can appeal for help to the local bureaucrats who also jockey for position. This game functions on both levels of competition.

You have been warned.