Ha!
I always suspected those slimy grey bastards, lurking in English Breakfasts and otherwise perfectly good risottos.
The good doctor may have to go into hiding with his comments about chocolate. I once stood behind a woman in a supermarket in Berwick St who was buying the two largest bars of Galaxy you can get and a box of tampons. Try standing between her and her chocolate and see how far you'd get. Limbs would be lost.